Monday 28 June 2010

Narrative by Edwina

http://dfafie.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/house-on-fire.jpg

Once upon a time there lived a boy called Tamati and a dog called Sam.


One night Dad said to Tamati: “It’s late and it’s not time to read.” When Tamati and Sam were sleeping they heard a sound and that went: “Beep, beep, beep.” So they jumped out of the bed and ran out. Tamati said: “We got to get out of here.” So they were ran and they called out: “Fire, fire, fire.”


After that they got outside and they saw their Dad at the safe meeting place.Dad rang 111 on his mobile and he said: “Please can we have a fire-fighter?” In a few minutes the fire fighter came and got the hose out and went inside to see if anyone was there.


They were safe and they lived happily ever after.


9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello Edwina.I really enjoyed your writing,your words formed a picture in my mind.Your use of direct speech added interest.Keep up the great work.
Mrs Pole

june said...

hi edwina i like your story about fire. and you even showed how the person got out of the building

joan said...

hi Edwina


what a great story about tamati and sam.

Isleworth Students said...

I think the story was great. I think the boy was sensible to get to the meeting place.

You have written a great story.

Joshua

http://isleworthschoolnews.blogspot.com/

Hannah said...

Hi Edwina I really like your story about fire in the house that was amazing and I like how you speak clearly you had a nice voise that was great.

Kate said...

Dear Edwina,
What a great narrative. I liked how your story had a message for us about what we should do when there's a fire.
From Kate.

Radha Moopanar said...

Hi Edwina

I liked yout story because it had a good structure.

Plessius Family said...

Hi Edwina,
I liked the way you set the scene and setting in your story. Well done, Karl's mum

Eseki Tanaki said...

HI EDWINA
I like your story it was very interesting and I like your picture you chose.